The A-Z of 2020

Let’s talk about 2020 today.

I’m just going to say it: 2020 was A LOT. We all had our own issues to get through and had a rough year. With the longest year of all time finally drawing to a close, I thought it would be good to look back at the year and draw closure from it. Then I had the idea of going through the alphabet with one word for each letter to capture what it was like living in 2020 and it was kismet. So, without further ado, I present, the A-Z of 2020; the emotions of living through ‘unprecedented times’!

2020 has been a year of:

Adaptation, to the ‘new normal’, to the complete 180 that life has made, to the many challenges 2020 has thrown at us. Growing under adversity has made us all evolve and get stronger and I am so proud of us.

Being, existing and persisting in such difficult times is a big deal in and of itself. We get points for just making it through and not being ‘productive’ in the middle of a pandemic.

Change, in the way we live, communicate, socialise and celebrate important life events. Zoom has turned out to be the real hero and staying connected while physically apart from a proper skill.

Difficulty, with all of us trying to navigate this never-before-seen situation. Many lost their loved ones and their jobs, many had to make difficult decisions, quite a few let go of their dreams.

Exhaustion, from trying to stay afloat, from being separated from loved ones, from being stuck at home, from not being able to live our regular lives and from living through the longest most never-ending year of all time.

Firsts, be it your first time baking banana bread or your first Christmas alone, there are so many new experiences both good and bad, that we’ve gained this year. We are living through history and these memories build our personal stories of it.

Gratitude, for the ordinary. Personally, this has definitely been my biggest lesson and I leave this year much more thankful for the littlest of things, like being able to hug my friends or just attend a class on campus than I was when I entered it.

Hope, for better times to come, of coming out better, of learning new skills. Our humanity shines in moments like these and our seemingly indomitable hope and spirit is what makes us special.

Ingenuity, shown by everyone everywhere. This year was, unlike something that had happened in most of our lifetimes yet people came up with the most creative solutions to the unique problems they faced.

Juxtaposition, of people discovering their old selves again and people losing their old selves completely because of the hardships they are going through. Of people finding appreciation for the little things while going through a major event. Of so much more.

Kindness, for everyone. People have really come forward with compassion for their fellow beings all over the world and hearing these stories really fills my heart with joy.

Love, of all kinds. Families, relationships, friends and more, everyone understood like never before the kind and depth of love they held for the people in their lives.

Mankind, of all of us. We have gone through a collective experience like no other, and it has been a truly transformative time for all of us.

Nostalgia, for the familiar. Many of us went back to our old hobbies to deal with a difficult situation and I think I speak for all of us when I say we all yearned for aspects of our ‘normal’ life that we didn’t appreciate enough before.

Ordinary. This year is not the year of being extraordinary or doing outlandish feats. It is one where even doing the most regular things is a feat in itself, and something to be proud of.

Patience for the people in our life, for our normal lives and for ourselves too. This year has taught us to slow down and be patient, whether we like it or not and has made us all see the virtues of slow living.

Quiet. If you live in a city like me, do you remember the deafening silence the pandemic brought on initially? That haunting quiet? The silence of the kind that seemed impossible before but has characterised so much of the year. In 2020, no matter where you went, silence was golden.

Reflection, on our past, our present and even our future. Many of us were compelled to think about the kind of lives we were leading, what we envisioned for ourselves and what we had to do to get there. This kind of reflection is very rare, and while forced was something I quite learned to embrace.

Sharing; your emotions to make the load lighter, your resources if you were privileged, your gratitude to the ones really sacrificing it all for our safety and most of all, for many of us, our true selves after a long, long time.

Togetherness. We may be separated physically but every single one of us is united by the experience of living through a pandemic and at some level has been affected by it.

Uncertainty, for the future. 2020 meant a lot of us had to reassess our life goals and were suddenly thrown into a lack of clarity about what the future would bring. The future is looking brighter now, with some vaccines on the horizon but still, hugely uncertain. We can’t know for sure what a post-COVID world will look like.

Vulnerability, of opening ourselves up, of emotionally exposing ourselves and of sharing the hidden aspects of our personality with people close as well as distant.

Weirdness. Truly. It has been such an absurd year; so much has happened and all of it is so different and unrelated from each other. It has been a truly wild year.

Xenia. Yes, I had to get a little creative and look a word up for ‘X’. I found this wonderfully apt though. ‘Xenia’ is the ancient Greek custom of generosity and friendship shown to those far from home. Through blogging and my blog Instagram, I have truly felt the gift of ‘Xenia’ manifold.

Yearning, hankering, hoping, wishing for better more comfortable times, for experiences of an age past, for people that are far.

Zen. I think 2020 really bought the importance of self-care forth and I’m really hoping we take this focus on maintaining our mental peace with us into the new year.

And that’s all, everyone! The best thing is that as hard as it was, 2020 is finally ending. So, pat yourself on the back for having survived through a very gruelling year and let’s bid adieu to never having to hear the phrase, ‘New normal’, Happy new year!

THIS POST’S QUESTION: What is one word to describe your emotional journey in 2020? Comment below with what you think about it, I’d love to hear from you!

 

 

One Year Bullet Journaling Update: Will I continue in 2019?

Let’s talk about me completing a year Bullet Journaling and everything to do with it today.

Hi!  One year ago, I made my first post about starting my Bullet Journal for 2018 and have tried to keep you posted on my experience trying out this new activity and exploring the world of Bullet Journaling. This post is the conclusion of my adventure with Bullet Journaling in 2018, the final update as well as talking about my future plans, if any, with Bullet Journaling.

If you have seen my post about My Bullet Journal Essentials, you know what pages I chose to have. The plan right now is to go over each of those pages, give you a before and after (If they change at all) as well as the new pages and talk about how useful I found those pages.

The Cover Page(s)

Obviously, this isn’t there as much for the “planning” aspect of the journal but mostly for the aesthetic value. I still love it and I made the last page to go with it and to cap off my year, contained in the pages in between. Its not as beautiful or meticulously made and I will get into why that is later.

 

A Calendar

I enjoyed making a physical calendar for ready reference in the journal so I could plan my days and months out. However, this calendar ended up making me realise how almost independent of physical calendars I have become after having the ready access f my cell phone’s calendar. I barely used it and honestly, I feel a little sad because as a child I used to love marking dates on my physical calendar. Technology really has changed me and this was clear evidence, even if its the littlest thing.

Year In Pixels

Year In Pixels was a great idea but the issue is that’s what it was. Maybe it’s just me and how careless I am or maybe its just being human but I found myself missing days. I’d fill them in later but that’s not quite exactly the idea is it. Still, I like having a reference of how my year went. It makes me realise that most days are just okay(In red) a good (in green) or an amazing (orange ) day are rare to come by so I should cherish them and cherish them well. Here’s my year in pixels when I started versus now at the end of the year.

Goals for 2018

I made a list of Goals at the beginning f the year which I wanted to achieve through the year. At the 6 month mark, I went back and looked at the list and made a part on how things are going with all my goals. ( You can find it in my Half Yearly Bullet Journal Update) At the end of the year, I did it again. This time, however, its a simple checklist. And I was happy to report that I somewhat achieved all my goals for the year though not all which I chalk up to being a mere mortal.

Trackers

I made trackers for some of my broader goals to help me track my progress towards achieving them. They were:

1.A Book Tracker: A place for me to list all the books I read over the year. I am the most depressed to report that I got though ZERO entire books through the year and so my book tracker is as empty as it was the day I started it. It is my worst regret and I intend on making a post about my lost superhuman reading powers and just how much it bothers me. Here is before(and after) of my book tracker.

2. A Movie Tracker: A place for me to list all the movies I watched over the year. I watched a total of 36 movies over the year and that roughly comes down to 1 movie every 10 days which are numbers I’m more than happy with. I have definitely made progress at movie watching (Which might seem like a stupid goal but I like stories and losing reading I needed to find a new way to get the required amount of stories to keep me and my imagination happy)and watched some great movies this year. Here is the before and after of my movie tracker.

 

3. A T.V Show Tracker: A place for me to list all the TV shows I watched this year. I am honestly happier with the shows I watched viz a viz the movies because some of them are all-time favourites of mine that I binge watch often. I watched 5 shows over the year which may seem like a small number but, considering that it was 0 shows in 2017, it definitely is progress. Here is the before and after of my tv show tracker.

 

4.A Blog Tracker: a place for me to record my blog-statistics related progress over the year. As you may have noticed from both my Half Yearly Bullet Journal Update. and the goal update in this post I didn’t meet a lot of my blog related goals. I just struggled with keeping up with my new life as a college student in the first half the year and in the second half I tried and had found a stride but my health gave up on me. So my statistics hardly look great if seen as separate one year apart statistics but individually I am quite proud of how much my teeny tiny little blog has grown. (Even if it is just an inch or two) Here is the before and after of my blog tracker.

Monthly Spreads

I had a certain format that Ive discussed before in my Half Yearly Bullet Journal Update. I write the name of the month, a quote that resonated with me that month and hello to the month with the origin of its name n the left page. On the right page, I write the month number on the top right corner and always have a firsts box for all the new things I did that month and a countdown of the number of months left in the year. Other boxes like Blog updates, mid-term and end-term updates and updates on other goals make regular appearances. I am happy with my monthly spreads and I enjoyed finding out the origins of the names of all months as well as having a summary of my month a lot, however, I found them a big hassle to make towards the end. I’ll talk more about this later.

Exam Schedules

I would write my exam schedules in as checklists with the name of the subject, date and time of the exam for both my midterms and my end terms so I’ve made a total of 4 schedules,2 for midterms and 2 for end terms.  Checking these was very fun and I did find writing my schedules down helpful because then the dates had a greater chance of sticking around in my head.

Birthday Page

Since my birthday is in the first half of the year you might have seen this in my post about it. basically, I wrote a letter to myself talking about my progress as well as shortcomings from the last year, my goals and aspirations for the upcoming year and a lot of positive affirmations. This was probably my favourite part of the BuJo and practise I plan to continue.

Final Thoughts: Will I continue Bullet Journaling?

The simple answer is well, no. I am not the artistic kind and by the end of this putting all this time and energy into something that is supposed to help me plan my life more effectively was frustrating and a big hassle. It is obvious through the pages too, the first few are dine with patience and I sat down and beautifully did them whereas the last one I just rushed through because the truth is, I dont happen to have a lot of time in my day.

As i mentioned before, my Last page is nowhere near as pretty as my first one and this is the very simple reason for it. It might just be me, my lack of artistic prowess or maybe it is normal to feel so defeated about a bullet journal. I felt the pressure to keep it pretty, mostly self-imposed and i struggled with it. I would forget to fill in the year of pixels in some days, I’d be drawing two monthly spreads together, I’d keep notes to remember to write in the movies and tv shows I watched.

What I would like to carry forward from this experience is the organisation it brought to my planning. So essentially I want to have its planner aspect and thus am not opposed o the idea of using a planner. For now, I have embraced the technology boom i was born into and use the Notes app to set reminders, make lists and make notes and basically, plan. It has been working well for me so far but it’s only the first month, who knows?

Would I recommend this to someone? Absolutely. It was fun when I wasn’t time-pressed or just under pressure or stressed. If they are artistic and like planners, this is the thing of their dreams. They will enjoy it so much. It may not be for me but that doesn’t mean others won’t enjoy it.

Lastly, I end my last post about bullet journaling (for now, who knows what the future holds?) and offer my admiration and respect for people who bullet journal regularly and have been doing it for years. It’s a task and its hard work and while i have realised i cant keep doing it that in no way means I am imposing my opinion onto you. Enjoy the BuJo adventure, fellow journalers and au revoir!

THIS POST’S QUESTION: Do you Bullet Journal? Have you done it before or do you plan to? Comment below with what you think about it I’d love to hear from you!

It was my year to be bold but was I bold enough?

Let’s talk about 2018, my personal motto for the previous year and looking ahead today.

Happy new year! How has your year been so far? Good, I hope. If not, I really hope it gets better.

My mother’s art for new year’s last year that I happen to love a lot. You can find more of this on her Instagram @passion_n_possession

Last year on the 10th day of March(My birthday), I vowed to make 2018 my year to be bold. I decided to make 2018 my year to take risks, to be brave and to be strong in the face of whatever life throws at me. I talked about this before in my post, My Year To Be Bold. Today, on the 10th day of 2019, you and I (mostly me but you bear witness) will attempt to dissect if I did indeed follow through with this motto. Let us begin.

As I put some thought into this I realised I had followed through with my goal, somewhat, but in ways, I didn’t expect. That aspect of it surprised me the most, I had decided to be bold in the face of life’s trials and to take major risks but really can every year of your life be full of major problems? More importantly, should it even be? Probably not.

Just a little quote I found on the website in the watermark.

This year, I took some risks yes, personally, sometimes even academically, and yes, some turned out to be for the better while some not so much but none so life changing that you know, I’d call it the one risk that made my life. This year I was ill for a good part of my first semester and I think all that gave me was a major fear of fainting. (I’ve never fainted before. No one talks about how awful it feels) I thought I’d wasted my motto of being bold on 2018. It could have been kept safe for a bigger year of my life like the year I start my first job or my postgraduate education. That makes sense, right?

After some more introspection, I’d say no. I had this realisation in the most innocuous of ways when I started to talk about what I’d like to do professionally in the future with a friend and I had this post at the back of my mind. I had the following epiphany and I’ll share it with you.

I realised I conquered little fears every day. I am a big introvert. I dont like making phone calls or small talk. (Of course, this doesn’t include friends and (close) family) I have a fear of crowds. They give me major claustrophobia. I have always found greeting people when you meet them anywhere to put me under a lot of pressure. I dont like chit-chatting with strangers for no reason.

But this year, I did it all and even better, I’ve improved at doing it all. I don’t let these anxieties of mine hold me back ,I’ve even made some of them my strengths and now, even professionally, I’d love to work with talking to people, now that I’ve discovered the joys of and liberation in sharing thoughts and opinions with people outside your circle, the wonderful human superpower that is, communication. That does not mean the fears magically disappeared though, no. It just means that the fight has become easier, the monster smaller, the anxiety lesser, the fun more apparent.

A quote I found on the website mentioned in the watermark.

So, the bottom line is, I was bold this year. It wasn’t in the big, obvious ways that I’d expected when I decided to be bold but the more smaller, innocuous ways. So, the question then changes from Was I bold? to Was I bold enough? Is there a way to measure boldness? A little meter that rises up little by little so you know that you were in fact, bold enough? How do I say I fulfilled my personal motto when there is no quantifiable way of deciding that? So, the question still stands and I put it forth to you as you have been on this journey with me today and because I have no real way to answer it myself, Was I bold enough?

THIS POST’S QUESTION: Do you think you can measure things like boldness? Comment below with what you think about it,I’d love to hear from you!